


Shut Up and Kiss Me

by peacenik_jesus



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-13
Updated: 2018-12-13
Packaged: 2019-09-17 19:04:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16980081
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peacenik_jesus/pseuds/peacenik_jesus
Summary: Jesus finds himself envious of the relationship Aaron seems to be developing with newcomer Javier.





	Shut Up and Kiss Me

Jesus felt like a rotisserie chicken from the amount of tossing and turning he’d done. No position was comfortable enough to sink into sleep and, try as he might, he couldn’t shut his mind off. Over and over he kept replaying the day’s events in his head, agonizing over his own missed opportunities. He could still hear Aaron’s laughter, could still envision the sultry glances being exchanged between the man of his dreams and Javier. Jealousy bubbled like toxic sludge in his gut as he watched, in his mind’s eye, the way Aaron had given a light squeeze to that intimate juncture between Javier’s neck and shoulder. 

It was supposed to be him. It was meant to be him eliciting that laugh, exchanging those glances, receiving that touch. Not Javier. He had been crazy about Aaron for as long as he could remember, and Javi had only been on the scene for about six months. Already he had wormed his way into Aaron’s heart, quickly becoming the object of the man’s desire, so far as Jesus could tell. 

Paul knew he only had himself to blame for letting Aaron slip through his fingers, but he’d never been good at dating and relationships. He’d been so afraid of making things awkward that he had decided that he would wait for Aaron to initiate something. As time drug on, though, it became more and more obvious that Aaron had no interest in him beyond friendship. He knew he should be happy for the other man—finding love these days was rare—but all he could feel was a sense of loathing towards Javier. It made him sick to think of what the two did when they were alone together. Imagining the intimacy that should have been meant for him was agonizing. 

Giving up on the idea of sleep, Paul climbed out of bed and quickly dressed. He laced up his boots, donned his worn leather trenchcoat, and stepped through the window that lead onto the balcony of Barrington House. Maggie had insisted that he move out of his trailer and take up a room in the House, but he’d never felt truly comfortable there. It reminded him too much of the group homes he’d lived in as a youth. 

Slipping over the rail, he bear-hugged the support pillar and made his way down to the ground, letting himself drop the last five feet and landing like a cat with a thud on the dirt below. 

“GEEZ…us,” Aaron had been sitting on the top step of the stoop, and had jumped at the sudden appearance of the other man, spilling whatever he’d been drinking down the front of his shirt. “What the hell were you thinking?! I get that you’re a ninja and all that, but you could have warned me!” The man’s ire was feigned, more surprised than angry, as he flapped the front of his shirt in a feeble attempt to dry it. 

“Sorry,” Paul cringed slightly, glad the man hadn’t been drinking anything hot. “I didn’t know anyone else was awake right now.” 

“I couldn’t sleep,” Aaron said, looking up at him. “You either?” 

Jesus offered a small shrug. “Hard to shut my mind off sometimes.” 

“I know the feeling.” 

Though his mind told him not to step on the landmine topic, he couldn’t help it. He tried to keep the bitterness out of his tone, but he could still hear it coloring the words. “Where’s Javi? You two have been pretty much inseparable lately.” 

“In bed,” Aaron answered slowly, looking at Paul with a curious gaze. “Last I checked anyways.” 

_Last I checked…_ The words branded themselves in his mind, and he felt his teeth grind together as unsolicited images of the two men in bed together flashed through his mind. He took his foot off the proverbial landmine, waiting for the explosion. “So…are you two…a thing?” 

“Would that be a problem?” 

The nonchalant non-answer ripped at his heart; he could feel himself becoming septic with envy, the poison seeping into his tone. “Why would it be? I’m not your boyfriend.” 

Aaron’s eyebrows rose a fraction for a only a moment before they pulled together in dismay. “What’s with the hostility?” 

Jesus rubbed the tension in the back of his neck, rolling his head from side to side in frustration. “Sorry. The additional people staying here are putting a strain on our resources. I’m just stressed,” he partially lied. People from both The Kingdom and Alexandria had volunteered to help expand the walls around Hilltop, and the project was taking longer than anticipated. Since Javi lived at Hilltop and Aaron in Alexandria, working on this project had allowed them to become closer. Too close, if Jesus had a say…which he knew he didn’t. 

“Sit down,” Aaron pointed to the step in front of him. “I may only have one working hand, but I still give a damn good massage.” 

“That’s not—“ Jesus started to protest, but Aaron’s eyebrows rose again with a look that stopped the argument. 

“Sit down.” He said again. 

With a sigh, Paul obeyed, sitting on the step below Aaron, the man’s long legs on either side of him. He felt a small tug on the collar of his trenchcoat. 

“Take this off.” Aaron instructed. “The fewer the layers, the better.” 

Was the man trying to torture him? Despite the mounting tension, Jesus shrugged out of the coat, letting it pool behind him against the step at his back. Aaron moved even closer, gently sweeping Jesus’ hair over his left shoulder. Paul felt the man’s fingertips brush against the back of his neck in the action, and the touch made his skin prickle with goosebumps. He grit his teeth together, his neck and shoulder muscles tightening automatically, frustrated by the effect it had on him and the fact that there was nothing he could do about it. 

When Aaron began to knead the knots just above his shoulder blade, Paul’s eyes began to close automatically. He hadn’t been kidding about giving a good massage. Jesus started to relax slightly, but tensed once more when Aaron spoke. “What do you have against Javi?” 

“Nothing,” Jesus answered, a little too quickly. 

“Mhm…” Aaron hummed in disbelief. “You want to try the truth this time?” 

_No._ Jesus’ brain automatically replied, his internal filter stopping it before it could push through his lips. He knew he couldn’t tell Aaron the truth without making things awkward, and the longer the silence stretched, the more tension he felt in his shoulders. He knew Aaron wasn’t going to relent, and he didn’t have a good enough lie to offer. He sighed, letting his head fall forward in defeat. “Promise you won’t think less of me if I tell you.” 

“I promise,” Aaron’s tone was serious, and the pressure of the message became lighter, more like a caress with the man’s thumb above his shoulder blade. 

Paul licked his lips, stalling for another second before he had to make his confession. “I hate seeing the two of you together.” 

There was a momentary stretch of silence before Aaron spoke. “What do you mean?” 

“It’s stupid, I know, but I can’t stand the way you two look at each other, the way you touch each other… He’s been here for like five minutes, and you two are already an item.” 

“Do we look at each other a certain way?” 

“Like you want to tear each other’s clothes off,” Jesus grumbled, annoyed at the image that sprang into his mind. 

“And you don’t like this.” It wasn’t a question so much as a statement of fact, so Jesus gave a small shrug in response. 

“I know I should be happy for you, Aaron, but I just don’t understand why him and not—someone else.” He had to stop himself abruptly before he said ‘not me.’ 

There was another small stretch of silence, each millisecond making Paul regret his words more and more. Aaron’s hand was still lightly massaging his shoulder. His voice was soft and warm when he finally spoke. “First of all, Javi and I aren’t together. He’s fun to flirt with, but that’s as far as it goes between us. Second of all, I wasn’t aware that anyone else was interested in me. And third…” Aaron squeezed his shoulder before his arm slipped around Paul’s chest, pulling him back slightly as he leaned down to speak into the man’s ear. “You’re kind of adorable when you’re jealous.” 

Jesus felt his cheeks flaming with embarrassment. His mind was trying to process the words, the gentle hold, and the breath against his ear all at the same time. Aaron slowly sat back, the backs of his fingers stroking along the side of his neck. Paul turned enough to look at the other man, a jumble of emotions vying for dominance between the center of his chest and the pit of his stomach. He couldn’t form words, but he didn’t need to. Aaron was laughing softly, and brushed a few errant wisps of hair out of Paul’s face as the wind made them dance. 

“Why didn’t you just tell me you liked me instead of getting yourself worked up over my imaginary boyfriend?” 

His blush deepened. “I was afraid of making things awkward between us if the feeling wasn’t mutual. I thought if you were interested, you would say something to me.” 

“How long have you felt that way?” Aaron’s fingers tucked his hair behind his ear and lingered at the side of his neck. Paul was pretty sure the man could feel his pulse racing. 

“Um…” he wasn’t sure honesty would be the best policy here without making himself look like he’d been pining away for years…which he had been, but did Aaron really need to know that? “A while.” 

The other man chuckled, shaking his head softly. “A while like a few months, or a _while_ while?” 

“A _while_ while,” he confirmed, finding that easier to admit than giving a specific amount of time. 

“I’m both flattered and frustrated by that.” 

Paul’s heart lurched painfully in his chest, feeling as though it had shattered into a million pieces. The feeling was obviously reflected in his eyes because Aaron quickly shook his head and cupped his cheek. 

“Frustrated that you never told me, Paul,” the pad of his thumb stroked across his cheekbone. “Frustrated that things could have been different for us all this time, because…” the hand slipped through his hair and cradled the back of his head. “The feeling has been mutual for a while.” 

Again, Paul’s brain was trying to process everything at once—the caress, the tenderness in his voice, the words… He opened his mouth to speak, but no words found their way out. 

Aaron laughed softly and leaned down, murmuring, “You’re kind of adorable when you’re speechless, too.” 

The ensuing kiss was soft and sweet, everything Jesus had ever hoped and imagined it would be. It only took a few seconds for his automatic responses to kick in and he turned fully towards Aaron, kneeling on the step as his hands cupped the other man’s face. The kiss deepened naturally and Aaron’s hand moved down his back to pull him as close as possible with the awkwardness of the steps. 

After several blissfully unbelievable moments, Paul eased back, hands moving to rest on Aaron’s shoulders as he pinned the other man with a look of feigned shrewdness. “A while, or a _while_ while?” 

Aaron laughed softly, “A while while.” 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“I didn’t want to make things awkward,” Aaron teased, parroting Paul’s excuse back at him and earning a playful glare. 

“Shut up and kiss me.” He grumbled, pulling Aaron back into another passionate kiss.

FIN


End file.
